“Windy … leave it to you to come up with something none of us ever really thought about before.”

“Well, Del,” Windy said to our one-man chamber of commerce, Delbert McLain,

I figger you got more-a your finger on the pulsations of America than anybody else whoever lives ‘round here.”

Delbert’s promotional agility is amazing to behold. Why, just the International Knife Sharpening Olympics by itself was enough to make a guy legendary, and it didn’t even happen because they couldn’t find enough dull knives to get it started. But the idea was worthwhile.

“I’m thinking what you need, Windy, is a campaign. You know … let everyone know about you wanting an honorary degree and just keep at it until it … happens.”

“Campaign?”

“Sure. How many local folks realize just how important that degree is to you?”

“Jest a couple’s all.”

“Hey, guy,” Delbert said, “let’s get out there and beat the drum on this. Okay? I’m behind your campaign all the way. Well, no, I can’t actually neglect my duties as the chamber of commerce to actively … campaign for you. But you figure something out and stick with it, and my money’s on you getting that degree. And if anyone asks for a reference, you just tell them to ask me.”

“Thanks so much, Delbert, you’re the best. So what should I do now?”

“Beats me,” he said, “but I know you’ll come up with something.”